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Moreover, every single one of these Republican inquisitors and Democratic defenders of the faith have staffs larger than Beyoncé’s entourage.

And yet, again and again, people pronounced it like they were encountering it for the first time, sounding his name out the way you would when you want to memorize your Croatian cab driver’s name for the cops because of the muffled cries for help you keep hearing in the trunk.

The worst, of course, was Representative Bonnie Coleman, who went on a stemwinder in defense of “Mr.

Strozak,” saying “Strozak” with great confidence over and over.

But then I would go back and turn it on again in the vain hope that we’d learn something new.

And each time, I was momentarily convinced that it was a recap or that someone screwed up and replayed the tape from earlier in the day.

But this guy has been in the news for 8 trillion years (I exaggerate for effect, but it does feel that way).

Fun fact: Elliot Ness was pretty convinced Al Capone was guilty. No, I’m not saying Donald Trump is like Capone or O.

And, if Ness texted that to a lover, that wouldn’t suddenly make Capone innocent. J.; I’m simply saying the relentless repetition of these text messages does not make Trump innocent of anything or Straboozle guilty of anything other than stupidly texting stuff, no matter how many ridiculous analogies the GOP can come up with.

“There must be a payoff for this smell.” “Um, nothing really,” our Earth representatives answer. But that’s expensive, and no one wants to eat food grown with human crap.

We just try to clean it up a bit before pumping it out into the water.” “Wait, what? “Yeah, we don’t really have much use for it.” “Wow, that is a lot of stupid, pointless, sh**,” the alien says with a look of disgust (which we’d recognize if we could interpret the aliens’ facial cues). I don’t know if I can remember a dumber week in which to follow the news.

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